update on my eating and homeschool

Well, over the last 2 months, I have gained 7 or 8 pounds. All the muscle I built over the summer running has officially turned into fat.....sigh.....

I have "started" my program many times over.....only to chuck the plan out in a few days. Started counting points again, then I'd try to eat the carb/protien plan.....only to give up and give in whenever I felt like eating whatever I wanted. Nin and I have still stayed pretty faithful to the running, only since it has snowed have we stopped. A short break in Sept, starting in October, running into the middle on November. I'm afraid of falling on the ice and don't think I'm comfortable running through the winter.

I did start counting points again on Sunday. This is day 3 for me with half my flex points gone. I had the munchies so bad last night, I just wanted to eat all evening. I counted everything I put in my mouth....

At church there was a word spoken from the Lord and I was pierced. "The Lord will complete the good work He started in you" THis was the verse God gave me when I started this journey 2 years ago. It blessed me and filled me with faith. I have to press on......I have no other option....(well I do, but death doesn't seem to appeal to me much!)


Homeschooling....

Years ago when Noah was a toddler, Joe and I started to research this path of homeschooling. I was extrememly immature in many areas. I had a dream, a vision....of what our homeschool would look like.....
Struggling with laziness, selfishness, a lack of discipline, and no structure, due to depression, it seemed like a healthy enviroment wouldn't happen for my kids. Last night in my bubble bath, I all of a sudden realized that the vision in my head of what my home would look like is what our home is!!! All the dreams I had for us, there is a foundation laid. Of course, we have our days, I have my moments, but I'm not bound to depression, fear and lies of no hope anymore.

In our homeschool philosophy as a family, we state that it is the priority to love God, eachother and the world. Academics come secondary to tying strings of fellowship and growing in the Lord. We believe that providing a rich environment with puzzles, books, paint, playdoh, crafts, crayons, educational videos, trips to the library.....will encourage them to go after what they need to learn instead of us shoving stuff in their heads all day. There has been much breakthrough when it comes to our academics as well. I am confident in our curriculum choices and the kids are responding well to it. I have taken the responsibility of teaching and training my kids to a new depth this year. A deeper revelation and joy has come.
I'm just really blessed to see the fruit God is growing in the kids and in us.

There is another side to this story....Caleb.(My first born son who died one year ago at age 9) My really good friend since I was 5, Morgan, she knows me better than I know me sometimes. She was over yesterday for a coffee and we were talking about how I've been feeling a bit 'off'. She pin pointed it right away, saying that, because I just put up the christmas trees and the holidays are approaching, I'm am missing Caleb. I feel guilty for saying this, but she pointed out as well that our family has many more resources now. More mental, physical and spiritual energy. More time, less stress which makes for a light hearted family. I am thankful that God did take him home. But there will always be a part of me that feels like something is missing.....