A satisfied heart pt 3 comments please!!!

Is this how you feel when it comes to walking your christian walk?

Most people grow up with a paradigm about pain and pleasure that could not be further from the truth!
In a nutshell, it is this:
I need to make good choices. So, I choose to live for Go have to give up the pleasures that make the world fun. I'll be a martyr and sacrifice. It's my duty. At least I'll be going to heaven one day.
So this person goes about making the hard, yet better, choices. Temptation comes their way and their "pleasure antennas" are alerted. Oh, that would feel so good! Maybe I'll just do it once. It's so enticing, so seducing, so satisfying! After several compromises, thier guilty conscience kicks in and they kick themselves and turn back to the Lord. They face their walk of pain once again. Until the next promise of pleasure passes by!

To be honest, I have sadly spent alot of my walk with Jesus this way. This is the very reason that people don't want to have anything to do with Jesus. They see so many of us, me very much included, "denying ourselves" from what we REALLY want. Who wants that? DIdn't Jesus promise freedom? Joy? peace? love? and life in abundance? Then why are so many of us not walking in those things? It's all about wrong thinking. This behavior modification. The lie that keeping us trapped in these patterns! It's not truly knowing the truth about what God has said about sin.

No condemnation from the last paragraph. It's just something to think about.
But I'm so excited to share the freedoms that God is showing me!! But not yet! This cycle in my life is being broken! this cycle of lies, deceit and death. I am just writing a little bit at a time. Write more tomorrow!!!!! Is there anyone out there where this is really hitting some heart strings? Tell me what you think of what I'm sharing! I would love to walk this with some of my blogger friends!

Blessings on you and yours today!

A satisfied heart pt 2

living a life of behavior modification

There are pleanty of self-help products around that promise to give you practical ways to change your behavior and enjoy a great life and successful relationships. They require a lot of self-implementation and will work, but they are all about behavior modification.

As long as you work the system you feel pretty good. You begin to gain a great amount of identity and success and fulfillment from your accomplishments! Unfortunately, these methods work only as long as you discipline yourself to perform and to remember the to-do list!

What's exalted and put on the pedestal is self.....the same self that comes crashing down when you forget or fail to perform!

You become self-judging because you have wrapped your identity and worth in what you have been able to accomplish.

A satisfied heart

I have been reading this book that is excellent! I am going to share little pieces of it each day for something to chew on, mull over and think about. It's actually a marriage book, but to lay a foundation, the first part of the book deals with our OWN personal relationship with our Father.

A satisfied heart gives without measure, simply beacause it has recieved so much.
A satisfied heart is generous because fulfillment and contentment banish all selfishness.

You are exceptional, purposeful and irresistible. You may not believe these things about yourself, but the treasures of your true identity and your intrinsic value and hidden in the depths of your heart. You will discover them when you heart is satisfied in God, for it is then that you will be able to cease from struggling and striving and know your place of rest and peace.

what 11 years ago looked like....

Feb 5, 1997

9:00 am
I woke up full of anticipation...

Yesterday, I went saw my dr. for my weekly prenatal appointment. I was officially overdue. I was due on the 31st of January. The dr. listened to my unborn son's heart beat and it was going strong. Everything looked like it was ready at anytime.

She took me into her office to tell me her game plan.

"Sarah, I would like to send you to the hospital for a 'non stress test'. It's a routine check up we do before we go ahead and induce a mother. I would like you to go to RUH tomorrow and get checked over and if everything looks great, I will induce you on Friday morning"

Friday???!!! I'm for sure going to have a baby on Friday???!!! WOW, my heart was beating so fast. Nervous for my first labor, yet totally excited to meet my first son!

So this morning, I was so excited becuase I got to have ANOTHER ULTRASOUND! I loved those things! Joe and I packed up and went to the hospital for our scheduled stress test. When we got there. They hooked me up to the fetal heart monitor. Caleb's heart was beating.....

12:00pm
But as time went on, they started offering me juice, food and telling me to change sides. They said that baby's heart was not fluctuating. (your baby's heart should see a wide range of numbers, beating fast, then slow....that shows that your baby is active and happy in your womb)

2:30pm
I was still enjoying all the attention. Joe and my sister sat beside me, keeping me company. Then after a while, the nurses still didn't look happy. So they called in some more dr.'s for their opinion. I was still pretty laid back and relaxed. Nothing was going to be wrong with MY baby. Nothing ever went wrong in my life. Never broke a bone, I got my period at the "text book time", I had straight teeth, good hearing, no allergies or skin problems. I was healthy.

4:30 pm
We moved to an ultrasound room to check on our baby. As far as I was concerned, it was exciting to see him again! I was happy to go and see him. As I laid on the bed and the tech was giving Caleb a good look, she too went and got more people. More dr.'s came in and out of the room. As time went on, I saw them whispering out in the hall. They were able to get a super big close up of Caleb's hand in the womb. His hand was all spread out with 5 beautiful fingers. But they wanted him to move. So they had this loud little buzzer that they put right near Caleb's head and tried to see if we could startle him into moving his hand......no twitching, no movement....

5:00pm
That's when I realized something was wrong. I just laid there, heart beating, not having a clue what was going to happen next. Even more Dr.'s came on the scene and more whispers were happening. Finally, they addressed Joe and I.
"We would like to induce your labor right away. We have reason to believe that your baby may be in serious trouble."
"TROUBLE? what kind of trouble?"
"He is showing signs of distress. He isn't moving the way we would like"
"So what are you going to do?"
"We would like to take you to a delivery room and break your water to induce labor"

Oh my gosh!! THIS WAS IT! I didn't have 2 more days. It wasn't going to be Friday like my dr said, it was going to be today! Totally scared of labor and afraid for my baby, I was in panic mode, but still trying to roll with the punches and stay cooperative.

5:30pm
Now in a delivery room, waiting for who knows what.....naked with a little gown on, cold, exposed, scared to death.
there seemed to be a million people in my room! dr's, nurses, my bed had a sea of people.
It was time. The doc approached me and said, "I would like you to bring your heels up to your bottom and let your knees fall to your sides. Try to relax. (YEAH RIGHT!) I'm going to break your water now."
All I kept thinking at that point was my prenatal class. They said that if your water is green or red, your baby is in serious trouble.
I kept thinking, "please, don't let it be green, please not green....I bet it's going to be green......please......"
SLOOSH>>>>>>
I lifted my head to see the color....
GREEN WITHOUT QUESTION!
I flopped my head back. Honestly, I can't tell you what I was thinking at this point, there was no time. All the doc's started literally running around, talking loud now, they didn't care if I heard what they were saying anymore.
I heard, "1,2,3...." on to a bed with wheels.

Running down the hall with me on a stretcher. Joe was told to get his greens on. I didn't even know where they were taking me, until I saw the sign on the ceiling....OR......
Oh, my gosh, I'm going to have a C section???
"1,2,3" on to another bed and a bunch of doc's in green. I was bawling, what was going on??????????

The doc said, okay i need you to count backwards from 10.....
"10, 9, 8........I felt them cut me open!!! they were cutting my stomach before I was out!!!
7, 6...............faded out........

6:24pm
Totally uncontious, Caleb william waldherr was brought into this world. Not crying, not breathing, not a beating heart. They revived my son and saved his life. He scored 1 or 2 on the apgar. he was blue. he was almost dead.....

I don't remember what day it was or what time it was when I woke up. I just remember being totally out of it. i opened my eyes to see I was in a hospital room with an iv pole. I don't even remember who was at my bed side. The first thing I remember is Joe had a small poleroid picture of our son from down in the NICU. He showed it to me and said, "this is our son"


(this obviously wasn't the pic he showed me) but this is what he looked like.

That is the story of Caleb's birthday.
The diagnosis:

My placenta had signs of being "old", they told us. They said that it came away from the wall of the uterus and broke baby, mother blood cycle. Caleb on that day, lost 80% of his blood. He was given a blood transfusion at birth. His brain suffered a very serious injury being without oxygen for that long. because of that, he had severe Cerebral Palsy.
We were immensly blessed that God gave him to us for 9 years. He taught us more than you could imagine.
I miss my son today.
I miss his squeal, his breathing, his kicking, his peacefulness, his patience.

I miss his room, his bed, his smell. His pee pads, his big diapers, his med packs.

I miss the school bus, his "winter coat" that he would spit up on everyday, his foot splints.

Giving him baths, scubbing his stinky little head and shaving it too. cutting his nails, cleaning his mouth with a toothette.

his standing frame, all the lights in his room, the glowing words on his ceiling.

I miss being able to push him with 3 other kids loaded on to his wheelchair. Running with him in the grass.

taking him into the hotub and watching him turn to melted goo. I miss how he would point out his big toe when he got excited along with both his arms.

I miss his stinky breath, stinky hands and the smell of his pillow.

I miss stubbing my toe on his wheelchair, trying to get down the hallway with laundry on the floor. I lifting him in and out of the van. I miss taking him to the dr. I miss everything today.

I see him eating cake in heaven with Jesus. Dancing a dance floor made of gold.
Having a choir of angels sing him happy birthday. Happy birthday son. we love you, we miss you and I will see you again soon.

caleb's birthday

my son would have been 11 in a week.....

i have no words.....
just remember him today and for the next week.

Why I am thankful today

I am thankful for:

A God that has chosen to come down from His throne, make himself a man, take nails that I deserved in my place....all to give me freedom. May I make Christ's sacrifice beautiful today!

All my 5 children. the blessing of being able to have them and raise them, teaching them everything the Lord has commanded us.....making little disciples....

My husband, a man of God, who fears and loves the Lord. Who strives towards righteousness in family, work and in the church body.

My extended family. Who all know and love God. Miracles have happened in my mom! There has been repentance and some real fruit from her life. My sister and my brother in law. Both who have been amazing friends, travelling buddies on this narrow road, and have given me the bestest nephew and niece EVER!

Friends that I love so much! Morgan, Steph and Jessy, Kari have been dear to my heart these days. There are many others too, but these friends, God has placed closer than ever for this season.

My blogger support. Without you, I wouldn't be blogging. All of you encourage me and challenge me to move forward.

The snow that is falling. To remind us that we are white as snow. just as we are. He loves us.

So what have I been doing?

1. Working really hard on my journey of losing weight. I have not missed a day since january 2nd in running on my parents treadmill. I go every second day for 30 minutes. I really enjoy that time to myself.

The problem is that you have to COMBINE diet and excercise to loose weight. I have been making some good changes during the day, but at night I really struggle. I want to snack on bad things, and alot of times, I give in. So I've only lost in 3 weeks, a meesly 3.5 pounds.

Trying to stay focused on not giving up and keeping my heart in check and in sync with the Lord. I've gotten rid of much of my music this week and replaced it with some praise worship techno. I trust that God will fill all that I need when it comes to my needs with music. (i'm kinda picky with the beat that I like to work out to)

2. Homeschool, of course! It was a nice december break, baking.....eating! :0 making crafts and enjoying family time. Right back into our schedule with a few more additions to the mix. Noah has a new social studies program that we started half way through the year, so the pressure is on to get caught up so he can finish the grade 3 package. Isaiah is determined to pick up cursive writing! It's so funny how they can be so different. I can still barely read noah's printing, but Isaiah is ready and we're going for it! She is still in the process of learning to read. But things will be much easier when she masters that.

3. This is lame.....but I have to say it....
I've changed my laundry schedule! YIPPEE! when you have a family of 6, laundry scheduling is top priority. You do NOT have the option to leave laundry to chance. So, for the last year, I've been doing it ONCE A WEEK! can you imagine? 9 loads all piled into a mountain calling to be conquered! All day to wash and all the next day to fold and put away.
The pro? I didn't ahve to look at it for the rest of the week!
The new schedule? One or two loads everyday. I was so sick of the mountain! I'm one of those pendulum swingers that need serious change to motivate me! Now there are 5 piles on the laundry room floor. Girls clothes, noah's clothes, socks and cloths, towels, and a pile for mine and joe's clothes.
So when Noah's pile builds up, his clothes go in and come out, he flods them and puts them away! EASY PEESY!
I can't stand to open the dryer and have things from every single room! this way, it's simplified and the kids can pick up the slack if it's their clothes coming out of the dryer.
Joe has appreciated not spending our weekends climbing mount laundrest.

4. Life group.
Joe and I have a life group at our home every tuesday. So much to say, but not free to. Other than we are being stretched, pulled, cooked, and being blessed beyond measure. it's a challenged being that we've never done this before, but are praying that God's will be done and His kingdom come. all it takes is faith the size of a mustard seed. I think where it's stretching us the most is our marriage. Learning to work as a team on a different game board. Staying in the word on a daily basis with 4 kids is a challenge, but is a must!!!!!

5. my mother..........
things still remain hard here. I have all these areas that I wish would change but they are out of my hands. The choices are up to my mom.....and most of the time, she chooses not to choose them. but how does god work? HE WORKS WITH YOU! what he wants YOU to do. MY attitude to it. And honestly, I fail it seems everytime! so hard to watch someone get sicker and sicker. If you feel led to pray for my mom and our family, your prayers would be wonderful.

well, that's some of what's going on, hope everyone is well, if you're still around and reading my blog, pop me a comment to say hi.
sarah/carbear

i'm still here

thanks nin, for speaking so clearly. Just exactly what I wanted to say!.....;) (in my comment box, she was so kind as to speak on my behalf....in her own words, that did not match mine AT ALL!!!!)

Just so happens that my hubby's blog and mine are on the same password, and he has a CRAZY password!
I haven't been able to log on!

Taking a blogger break has been nice tho.
On the contrary of what nin says I'm doing....school is busy and our life group is keeping us on our toes.

Not much else to say, then "i'm back"
i think that's the longest i've gone without posting!

PLEASE PRAY!

All you lovers of God, I call out the voices that God has given us to use!

Whether your faith feels shaky, strong, whether you are a long time prayer warrior or wonder if there's a God at all.....
I ask you to muster up the faith that God has given you even if as small as a mustard seed, God will hear it, use it, and be glorified....

Our dear friends Holly and Darcy just gave birth to their 6th child, Ethan Issac. Beautiful boy with tons of hair! You can see some pictures on Darcy's blog here.
Ethan was admitted to hospital last night. He was losing weight and there were a few signs that something just wasn't quite right. Since then, the doctors have done a few tests. The reports are not complete yet, they are still testing, but so far they have found these things. His heart is not as big as they would like. They have found some irregular beating going on and will do some futher tests. They are also going to test his thyroid and possibly do a ct scan.

As most of you know, they do have 6 kids. Their oldest has been left in charge of more responsiblities now that Holly and Darcy will be going back and forth to the hospital. Please pray for all their children, including Joshuah.
Pray as the Lord leads
Thank you for praying, for taking a leap of faith and lifting up this amazing family.

wow

Something to think about in the busyness of Christmas

no wonder i'm so screwed up

my parents as elves!

click here

my cry

Calloused and bruised/ dazed and confused
My Spirit is left wanting something more
Than my selfish hopes/ and my selfish dreams
I’m lying with my face down to the floor
I’m crying out for more

Give me Words to speak
Don’t let my Spirit sleep
Cause I can’t think of anything worth saying
But I know that I owe You my life
So give me Words to speak
Don’t let my Spirit sleep

Every night, every day/ I find that I have nothing left to say
So I stand here in silence awaiting Your guidance
I’m wanting only Your voice to be heard
Let them be Your Words
I just don’t understand this life that I’ve been living
I just don’t understand
I just don’t understand these lies I’ve been believing
I just don’t understand


In Christ alone my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song
This Cornerstone, this solid ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm
What heights of love, what depths of peace
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease
My Comforter, my All in All
Here in the love of Christ I stand

In Christ alone, who took on flesh
Fullness of God in helpless babe
This gift of love and righteousness
Scorned by the ones He came to save
'Till on that cross as Jesus died
The wrath of God was satisfied
For every sin on Him was laid
Here in the death of Christ I live

There in the ground His body lay
Light of the world by darkness slain
Then bursting forth in glorious Day
Up from the grave He rose again
And as He stands in victory
Sin's curse has lost it's grip on me
For I am His and He is mine
Brought with the precious blood of Christ

No guilt in life, no fear in death
This is the power of Christ in me
From life's first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny
No power of hell, no scheme of man
Can ever pluck me from His hand
'Till He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand

A new baby!

Our very good friends had their 6th child!
Beautiful! Click here

Blessings y'all

Questionare....join in if you want and do your own!

1. What kind of soap is in your bathtub right now?
Johnsons vapor bath, Lavender grins and giggles, Aussie shampoo and phisoderm.

2. Do you have any watermelon in your refrigerator?
Are you kidding? How much are those things in the winter and they are the size of an orange!

3. What would you change about your living room?
The whole thing!!! New furniture, new pictures, new paint, new windows, new blinds or curtains, I haven't decided, and way down the road, new carpet......I know I should be content with what I have...and for now, it's great with my xmas tree and candles.
.
4. Are the dishes in your dishwasher clean or dirty?
Clean

5. What is in your fridge?
Pretty much all the basics, nothin fancy, exept for some xmas cookie dough waiting to be baked, icing to decorate our gingerbread house....and...OH, I put frank's red hot (XXXhot) sauce in my favorite salad dressing! Asian sesame!

6. White or wheat bread?
Both, I wonder if you can guess who eats the white and who eat the brown???

7. What is on top of your refrigerator?
The gingerbread house we just made from scratch (ready to put on the candies!)and the blinds I took down from the kitchen window to paint it and they're still there!

8. What color or design is on your shower curtain?
Right now, it is currently red because my bathroom is currently Christmas themed! Usually it's got a ton of cool fishies on it.

9. How many plants are in your home?
I just threw the last 2 out 2 weeks ago! I used to have like 12 or so! No time to tend to them, and to be honest, I lost my interest, which I believe someday will come back.

10. Is your bed made right now?
Never.....(blush)

11. Comet or Soft Scrub?
Soft for sure. Comet is for my mom that may have OCD

12. Is your closet organized?
Which one? Mine-yes, Hall- yes, Coats- yes, Girls-no, noah's-doesn't have a closet, elishah's-no (hers is the worst)

13. Can you describe your flashlight?
Don't have one....need one

14. Do you drink out of glass or plastic more at home?
Usually at home, I fill a plastic squirt bottle with a drop of essential oil lemon....yummy

15. Do you have iced tea made in a pitcher right now?
no....we never have juice or sugary drinks. (except, I promised Faith apple juice, because she's sick right now)

16. If you have garage, is it cluttered?
no garage, no clutter

17. Curtains or blinds?
10 year old 500 dollar blinds that do the job, but are outdated and would love to re do our living room! (did I say that already?)

18. How many pillows do you sleep with?
2 one for my head, one to hug

19. Do you sleep with any lights on at night?
i wouldn't, but I need to get up once a night for elishah, so I don't want to trip. the bathroom light stays on. My girls have colored bulbs in their rooms. Elishah has an orange bulb, noah has green and isaiah has red.

20. How often do you vacuum?
almost everyday.....only because my carpet shows everything, we have guinea pigs and 4 children.

21. Standard toothbrush or electric? standard...electric is a gimick


23. Do you have welcome mat on your front porch?
it doesn't say welcome, but we have a mat. We assume you know you're welcome, if you don't know you're welcome, then your not! HAHA

24. What is in your oven right now?
Nothin, it's 9 in the morning! But it's been busy bakin cookies, gingerbread, shortbread and christmas ornament dough!

25. Is there anything under your bed?
dust

26. Chore you hate the most?
cleaning the bathrooms!!!!!!!


28. Do you have separate room you use an an office?
It used to be caleb's room.....:(

29. How many mirrors are in your home?
4

30. Do you have any hidden emergency money around your home?
I'm not telling you that! besides, we have none...
.
31. What color are your walls?
orange, green, blue, periwinkle, yellow, olive green wine red, beige, white

32. What does your home smell like right now?
Fresh coffee french vanilla...yum, going for my second cup now

33. Favorite candle scent?
cranberry in the winter.....such an atmosphere! ( I have those glade ones where the candle melts into a pool of wax, smells so nice!)

34. What kind of pickles are in your refrigerator right now?
dill chips, and pickled beets

35. Ever been on your roof?
yes! it's my job to put up the lights and i love it everyear!!! i change our colors every year. this year is green red and white


36. Do you own a stereo?
too many! My hubby loves electronics. which hubby doesn't? mine doesn't like a single sport, but we have the top of the edge technology (as much as our wallets can handle) I love it! He wants to buy a snow blower this year!! sheesh, for those of you that know how much sidewalk we own will figure out that he just wants another "toy" LOL


37. How many TV’s do you have?
3 Blush One big !@# TV downstairs, Our old one upstairs and a little half broken one in the girls room that isn't hooked up to cable. We went as a family for 8 years NO TV! Now that Joe's with Shaw, we're all sooped up.


39. Do you have a housekeeper?
HAHAHAHA ME!!!!

40. What style do you decorate in?
???whatever mood I'm in still tying to find my style...Hopefully my sis doesn't mind, but I rely on her for style...for clothes and home.

41. Do you like solid colors in furniture or prints?
I love solid, but that is a disaster with 4 kids! We'll have to wait

42. Is there a smoke detector in your home?
yep, isn't that regulation?

Sick kids and laundry

Don't forget to catch up on pics on my last post! There's some good ones....

Well, a different flu has suddenly hit our home again....this has been my last 24 hours...

5am: Changing Elishah's bedding from a bottle leaking all over her and the crib

6am: Changing Faith's bedding and washing a pillow because she threw up all over

8am: Changing Faith out of her Pj's that were covered in runny poop all up her back

9am: Scrubbing our new carpet, because Faith puked all over our basement stairs

10am: Washing our brand new brown comforter because Faith went diareaha all over it

10:30am Cleaning up 2 cups of spilled coffee, courtesy of Elishah's busy cruisin

11:30am Washing another pair of poopy pj's
Do I dare go on?

I has mount washmore in my laundry room that I need to conquer
I have our Lifegroup Christmas potluck that I need to prepare for
I have my niece's birthday tomorrow
And I'm still not done my Christmas shopping and baking!

If you have a burden, Please, I covet your prayers for us. Pray for complete healing and revelation. That God would show us anything that we need to do. Last year IM NOT KIDDING OR EXAGGERATING> (nin could testify) Our home was sick for 3 months straight!!! 12 weeks of fevers, flus and coughs. I have been wounded and have become intimitated of sickness even tho the word says that Christ is our healer. I have my doubts. (God forgive my unbelief!)

I'm still up and it's 12:30 am Pics....Finally!

Sometimes I stay up really late just to enjoy my house when it's quiet. Tonight Joe sold a computer which gave us some extra cash to do some more shopping. Got a babysitter, cleaned my house, came home to a clean house and kids in bed.

I lit my candles, turned on channel 419 "holiday instrumentals" (Galaxy audio listening) Comes complete with all our extras with Joe working at Shaw! I wrapped most of the presents and feeling a bit more prepared for Christmas.

I hate the pressure of buying gifts. Spending a ton of money when you don't need to. I wish it were just a time to be with family, eat turkey and hang mistletoe. Joe and I give our kids one gift each and that's it. This year they are getting two, one is their first bible! We got Noah this "super heroes of the Bible" Isaiah's is in the International Children's Version (which I'm super excited to read out loud to the kids! I am excited for me to hear it in a plainer version.

Tomorrow is our busy day, Library, story time, Piano Lessons, and Tae Kwon Do. We used to have an art class and a music class for the girls in there too! One of which I taught! (for me...that was WAY too busy!) But I did it....I made it to the end...for me it was good to see me stick out that commitment. Glad those classes are over....even tho they were a blast. Here is a picture of our little class. These are the faithful kids that came every week, I gave them each a framed picture at the end.

I should get some sleep. My kids will need a rested mom in the morning.
Noah said to me tonight when I was putting on some makeup..."mom, why do you always put on makeup? You are pretty all the time, even when you first get up and you walk around with your eyes closed....like this....(then he proceeded to demonstrate my morning face!)" Here's few pics to catch y'all up (I used that word just for your pleasure Corey!


Twinkle, twinkle little Elishah....How we wonder how your siblings could use you as a sticker board!



Our new Christmas Idol and our old one. "and the stockings were hung by the chimney with care...."



Daniel's first finger painting! And I got to be the one to do it with him!

My best friends baby and mine. they are 3 weeks apart. So adorable!





RRRRRRRRR We are smugglin diamonds!




We are the pirates who don't do anything, we just stay at home and lie around and if you ask us to do anything....we'll just tell you.....we don't do anything....


We are the sisters who have big laugh attacks, we just make fools of ourselves. And if you come out in public with us.....we'll make a fool.....out of you too!!!


HA...(evil voice) I'm Darth maul, I am on my way to finish the last of the jedi. I have sent out my prodo droids, it won't be long now....my very cool double light saber is in my back pocket.....Nah....(faith's voice) I'm just going around the block for some candy!

Ooompa Loompa....doopidee doo. I've got a head that's too big for my shoe.....oompa loompa doopadeedee....If you are a wise, you will listen to me (cause I have such a big brain...in my skull)



Faithfulness at the fun factory


The bestest picture of Daniel ever! How many pics do I have of daniel in this picture post anyway??? Hmmmm, obsess much???



Time to play outside.....then come in for hotchocolate and marshmellows. Faith made her first snow angel that day!

Paaaaaseeecohhhhhh!!!
Paaaaaseeeecohhhhhh!

(that's her cree name, and I'm singing it while I type it.) Those of you that know, I'm sure you can hear the little song in your head.

That's all folks.
Okkiee dokiee Cora lee!!

The reasons why

Convicted yet again over my reasons for loosing weight. I went out for coffee with a friend the other night and we talked about where our hearts were. I was very upfront and honest. I knew the reasons why. Mostly to be thin and to feel good about myself. What happened to being obedient to my Lord and Savior? What happened to being passionately sick of the sin of gluttony? Over time, my heart turned from right motives to wrong ones. Not to say that my heart went from holy to evil, but sliding off track in my desires. Deep down, I desire right relationship with my Daddy in heaven, it's so easy to get distracted.

God is shedding light on parts of me that need unconditional love. We all do as humans, we were created that way, so that we could find that unconditional love in Him, the one who created us. Our creator put it deep down to search for it. And most of us search for it in the wrong place. For me, He has opened my eyes to show that I am hoping to gain that acceptance from being thin. It's sad, I know.....Shallow even. Well, honestly, I don't see it that way. It's just a misplaced need that needs correction and healing.

I just pray that relationship will be restored, doing this for Him and no one else.

I've still been running, and having a blast on my parents new treadmill. I am being faithful to the walk, but there's a huge thing missing. My passion for righteousness. To say no to that extra cookie, not because I ran out of points, but because I'm full and want to submit my flesh to God. I want to die to self so He may live in me....

I want to run with that picture of Jesus at the end of the finish line cheering me on, teaching my along the way of faithfulness, steadfastness and trusting in Him. Not to run with a thin me in my head to keep me going!

These are my thoughts. I pray that God can do a change in my heart. One that lasts, for fruit that lasts....

elishah the elf

click here

Isaiah the elf

Click here

I have elfed my kids!

Super funny just click here