A picture I got at the lake

At the lake for one week. It seemed that the week I was supposed to relax and enjoy my family, I pass through a wave of grief and pain. I made a promise to God a month or so ago to allow myself to be real in the moment-to feel pain when it comes-to make sure that I never wall myself off in self protection mode. So on the way up to the lake.....the wave began.

It was a super good time. I did enjoy my family, I did relax and we built memories and relationships.....but all the while, the inner turmoil remained.

Staying as vague as possible, I realized a picture of my life. I was at the beach with my kids, soaking up the rays. For one small moment, I caught a glimpse of peace. My spirit was able to connect to the truth of my situation and my eyes were opened to the REAL reality. It was like for that one short moment, a HUGE weight lifted from my heavy suppressed heart. It was like I came up for air after someone was holding me under water.....it was amazing......

Every now and then (it seems like 2% of the time) this happens to me. It's like for a short, sweet moment-I can breathe. It's like I am out from under torture.....only for a moment. Then....It's gone. Just like at the beach that day, it was snatched from me as quick as it came. The peace was gone. Feeling the weight back on my shoulders, I desperately wanted it back! I tried to go back to that "place".....but couldn't.

Later that day, I shared with Joe what happened. I cried. I don't know how to get free. I'm reading the shack and just like Mack said to Jesus the night they were looking up at the stars, "I feel so lost"......I TOTALLY understand how he felt. Apparently, Jesus answered Mack and said, "you're not lost......You are so far from lost" Jesus took his hand in that moment. I cried and then again.....threw the book (like I usually do)

ROTFLMAO!

Deep fried Spam slice on a stick


A peanut butter, banana, honey and bacon sandwich on potato bread, dipped in egg batter then fried in bacon fat, topped with butter and blueberry syrup.
Mini double cheeseburgers with chicken McNuggets for buns.

I had a good laugh at this blog.....

You can visit the blog here.
Here are a few things I thought were super funny I had to post them!

A pizza consisting of Thousand Island dressing as the sauce, topped with a family size bag of chicken fingers, a container of bacon bits all smothered in sliced mozzarella cheese.

A brioche bun with cotton candy filling.
Deep fried cheeseburger on a stick.
A one third pound of sirloin topped with two slices of white American cheese, four strips of bacon, peanut butter, between two Krispy Kreme donuts.
Spam that has passed through a french fry press and is deep fried.