Let me take you on my adventure with me! Ready......here we go.....:):)
2 months ago, I am walking with Audrey. I am telling her my struggles with food and my many failures at weight loss. I share with her with a hardened heart of stone that I'm bulemic...and that's just who I am. As we get to my house, she speaks into my life. I've heard encouragement before. Many have told me that God will heal me. I have even tried telling myself the same truths, but it could never penetrate my hardened heart. But this time, without warning, her words cut through like that darn double egded sword! All of a sudden, I am totally shocked that my eyes have tears and my heart is hurting. I tell myself, "hey, wait a second! I don't want to hurt over this anymore! Why is my heart going soft??"
God had other plans.....He usually does.....
God says, through Audrey, "I AM BIGGER THAN THIS STRUGGLE"
It was simply put, said in passing.....but I knew that it was true and that it was time to start walkin this road....
Do you think this journey is about issues with food???
CAUSE IT'S NOT!
God is using this mountain in my life to speak far more than I ever thought possible!!
When I was walking with audrey that day, I took a look at my life as I was sharing my testimony with her. I told her of small mountains, hills and a few valleys. (marriage, kids, staying the path, submitting to authority....) Then I shared with her "my Mount Everest"------> My stronghold of gluttony. The one mountain that will never be conquered. The one place that can not be helped, changed, or touched....
I have told myself that if God conquers this battle----HE CAN DO ANYTHING!
I am no longer afraid
I have jumped off my cliff and into my father's arms.
Looking back, I realize that my perspective was WAY OFF! My "mount everest" was actually a small hill. My lack of faith made a mountain out of a mole hill. God has much greater mountains for me to cast into the sea than bulemia! What are they, I don't know yet, but we are to know in part so that FAITH CAN DO IT'S WORK. The word says that our faith is MORE VALUABLE THAN GOLD and that it MUST be proven genuine so that God gets all the glory honor and praise.
I love nin's post! To PUT your hope in the Lord is an action. It's a stepping, it's a physical moving. Not a feeling, not an excitement in your spirit, not a acummulation of knowlegde.....BUT TO MOVE MOVE MOVE MOVE.....GET GOING....GO GO GO
I have lost 13 pounds so far....(big deal...) That is the fruit of a STEP BY STEP obedience to God's call.
What was God's call for me?
To loose weight and stop being so fat?
To fit into my old clothes?
To look good for others?
To "feel" attractive for my hubby?
To "help" my self esteem? (By the way, I've learned that "self esteem" is actually the best recipe for depression. Think of the word....SELF esteem?? Aren't we supposed to be selfLESS? Isn't our identity supposed to be in Christ, not in ourselves?)
God's call for me is much greater than all that shallow crap
He desires to set me free
so I can set the captives free
heal the lame and the sick
to GO and make disciples!!!!
And a personal bonus for me.....I can be a dancer without killing myself everytime I jump a few times....(sigh)
This is only the tip of the iceburg.
God is faithful
perfect in timing
perfect in judgement
perfect in love
perfect in compassion
perfect in power
perfect in discipline
The word of the Lord is perfect....totally flawless ( Psalm... something.....)
Thanks for walking with me.
Gotta go keep on truckin'
Love you all!
3 comments:
I read this last night: "the gods we serve, that involve the most obvious sins may quickly be identified and dethroned when we become christians, but the ones that more easily escape our attention do so because they have become so intricately woven into the whole fabric of the social, culteral and national context in which we live, that we simply cannot see them..." Wow! Yes! But God is giving us eyes to see! Because we are fixing our eyes! What an honor to be a part of the huge things God is doing all around. To see the works He's doing in so many lives is amazing, He is the King of Kings! And all gods WILL be dethroned! So many many blessings to you my awesome sister!
Hey again CareBear! Have you visited my friend Tina's blog? It's www.finallyfreeinhim.blogspot.com. I've known her since college...awesome person...strives to obey the Lord and she is so transparent [kind of reminds me of you. :-)]
Anyway, she has been set free from gluttony and has been losing weight for over a year. She has pictures of her progress throughout her blog. She may be a source of encouragement when you need that extra "umph" to press on.
Just wanted to share that with you.
Blessings to you!
I have been struggling with my weight for 8 years (since the birth of my first son). Before that I was thin, fit and healthy. It has only been this last year and a half that I have started to make breakthroughs. I have done lots of self analysis and realized that my problems with weight stemmed from me being disappointed and feeling like a failure. I have accepted my life, and my self and the weight has started to come off. I have a long way to go, but I am making baby steps. 13 pounds is wonderful! Feel proud!
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