Today I woke up and didn't shake it off. I started off the day with eating 3 croissants loaded with jam and felt like crap. Tempted to get rid of it again, I decided that I'm not going down a road that takes me to death. I made a bad choice for breakfast, and I'll have to live with those choices.
As the day has gone on, I have chosen not to turn to the One who can save me.
Don't you hate that! When your in desperate need for Him and you run away!!!
Dependance dependance dependance
Why do we so badly want independance? When all that gives us is a mess?
How did I get here? Our pastor's wife said once, "you walked there."
But really, I haven't spent time in the word for over a week, I haven't soaked in His presence.
What's really happening is I"M STARVING!
Spiritually, i am starving. So, to survive, I'm running to what I used to run to to make me feel better....food.
Note to self: I'm not starving physically....so do not eat food
I'm starving spiritually....so eat the word.....
Why am I doing this? Why did I loose all this weight? Why have a chosen to walk this way in relationship to food?To show His glory through me
To Obey Him
Inwardly I am renewing myself, not outwardly
To take care of the temple He lives in (being a good steward of what he's given me)
To be an imitator of Him
To make a stand against gluttony and all the crap that comes with it!
To set an example to those walking around me
To show that through Him ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE
To show God that I trust him
I am not doing it .....
To get skinny
To be competitve
To be boastful
To look like a cover on a magazine
To be a size....6
To be a stuck up snobby skinny person LOL
Father, you are the lord, who has made all things. You alone stretched out the heavens and spread the earth. You've performed many wonders. The things You planned for us, no one can recount. They are too numerous to count.
I rememeber today that God loves me just the way I am. My worth isn't based on my dress size or phyiscal appearance.
It's based solely on the fact that God loves my unconditionally. He simply loves me with a never-ending, wide as the universe love.That is me today. I'm am hungry for some real food now
I'm am a little weary from walking in sin at the moment, but God is faithful and just to cleanse me from all unreighteousness, when I TURN TURN TURN from my sin and to Him. ANd that's what I'm doing right now.
Blessings
6 comments:
AMEN SISTER! Your hearts prayer is truth, spoken from the Holy Spirit who resides very much in you and upon you. It is NOT based on our performance, nothing we can say or do or think or feel can win or gain anything that we have not ALREADY recieved from the death burial and ressurection of our Lord and Savior. You have chosen Him, given your life to Him, decided to "live like a believer, turn your back on the deceiver", your direction is obvious. So glad that even in your slip, you were able to see and hear the truth, turn from the lies and walk towards the Son. Thank you for sharing your struggles, your joys, your triumphs, your victories, you're falls, battle bruises and all. I love you, and am so amazed at God's work in you. I trust the God in you, that He will continue to chip away at the old habits, until they are NO MORE. Love ya, blessings.
Thank you for your giggly comment, and reminding me that much more, of how silly our mom is. Like I could forget.
Another great convicting post.
THANK YOU!
I am now blogging at:
http://joyinthemorning.clubmom.com
i love you
thank you for your honesty and open heart
i'm proud of you!!!!
Thanks for being transparent! You are a fabulous friend and I am so glad that you are on the road of truth. Sometimes it is a little bumpy but it is good.
"Don't you hate that! When your in desperate need for Him and you run away!!!"
Ugh! I've circled that mountain more times than I care to admit. I don't know WHY we do it...I think you hit it on the head with saying that it stems from wanting to be independent. We want to fix ourselves...all by ourselves. And yet we can't. And we know we can't...but we try in our own strength anyway, forgetting that our real strength comes from Him and His Word.
Stand strong Sister! Feast on the Holy buffet...you are sure to be satisfied!
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